Fate

The fact that I am not progressing is bothering me.

Why is it that everytime you want a certain thing to work, it never does? No matter how much time and effort you put into it, and how careful you are, it still doesn't work the way you want it to. I have always heard if it is meant to happen, it will. It seems as if that phrase and "Everything happens for a reason" are the only two phrases people know these days. It is as if they live their life by it, and have become religious to the saying. Although I do believe in fate, I also believe I can control the actions and consequences in my life. If I keep failing at making things work with a certain girl, should I simply let it go and think, "If it is meant to happen, it will"? Hardly. On the contrary, I do what I can to show my interest in her, and if the interest is not returned, I will then, possibly, let it go.

The reason I'm bringing this up is because it's been in the back of my mind for too long. It hasn't been bothering me recently, but it hit me today. You see, the thing is, I simply want to carry out the process of being friends and forming a deeper relationship, but when she doesn't show any interest, whatsoever, I am encouraged to give up and lose all hope. It's just like music. I give up every night. But when I wake up in the morning, I go back to it, because that's all I know. I've been involved with music for so long now, it's apart of me, and I can't let it go, even though most of the time I wish I could. It's all complicated for me, but honestly, I feel as if I'm chasing something that isn't there.

But as my peers have told me, if it is meant to happen, it will.